09 10 / 2013
I’m not used to playing offense in love
05 10 / 2013
( of young people )
There’s almost a guilt I feel that I got to live another year that they didn’t.
How do you celebrate them? How do you remember those gone? What would they want us to do? What would I want people to do when I’m gone? Anything?
16 9 / 2013
how good, fun, functional relationships actually work because I enjoy you so much
how LDRs don’t have to be hard when they’re as fun as this is
how much my heart is capable of feeling
how much hope one can have, how the future can be exciting and wonderful rather than scary and overwhelming
(but I like the present a whole lot too)
11 9 / 2013
1st week: OMG friends! New city! People! Fun activities!
2nd: Syllabi! Cool professors! Love these subjects! I love this campus! I’m here!
3rd: Clubs! Campus involvement! Let me make myself busy!
4th week: oh wait, college is school? Oh yeah. College. School.
26 8 / 2013
Live/work in Washington, DC.(checked summer 2012)
3. Ride in a helicopter.
4. New Zealand- visit the Shire.
5. Spend time at YWAM and IHOP bases.
6. Visit every continent. (Africa, N. and S. America, Europe and Asia down. 2 to go.)
Ride an elephant.(July 2011)
8. Be at Yosemite during the Perseids.
9. Be in London during Guy Fawkes’ night.
Do a mud/color run.
26 8 / 2013
It’s like I’m standing there freaking out and telling him I’m about to fall when just before I can, he opens my eyes and shows me the bridge he’s laid out before me
25 8 / 2013
i wonder why I’m so terrified of being someone’s “girlfriend”
20 8 / 2013
I love it here
This weather is wonderful
Everyone is so friendly and political and great
This school is so perfect for me
So many fun events and oppportunities
wow I’m so happy and so at home
(I know that sometime soon, classes will start and I might have thoughts more like)
yikes this paper is taking forever and going nowhere
I’m not ready for this level of french
I miss LA
I just want to see my friends from home
but for now, I’m trying to encapsulate and remember this time because everything is pretty freaking great,
and at the end of the day I KNOW I’m at the perfect school for me and couldn’t be happier
14 8 / 2013
Have you ever met someone you wished you could put everything on hold for?
I have a tendency to fall in love with almost everyone who crosses my path. Not just an eros love, but very much a love of the humanity in each person I meet- I want to know where they come from, what excites them, where they hope to be going. What they love and what they fear. And all too often, these people are in my love for a blink but I want to hold on.
And right now, I feel like I’ve fallen in love. In every sense of the word, i love this boy. Everything about him is wonderful. I want to hold him and never leave. But I feel like I’ve crossed his path too early- or too late.
There are certain things that are expected of us in the general plan of our lives. We go through school, college, get a job somewhere, somehow meet someone and get married. I want these things. At some point, his plan and your plan have to become one. But what if he’s come before you can stop living your independent plan? Eventually I’ll have to make sacrifices and work to fit someone in. But in the meantime, I feel like this waiting and trying and we’ll skype tomorrow if I get a chance just isn’t worth it, since it’s going to be a very long time before any of those plans could merge together.
If there’s any future or if I’ll only ever get to hold him for this magical second, I’ll hold on and am grateful for the chance.
But I love this boy now. I just want to run away with you.
02 8 / 2013
26 7 / 2013
I hate meeting perfect boys who are perfect but go to school in LA and I go to school in DC or live elsewhere and just #WHY